Sunday, 19 February 2017

Fart mania...hahahaaa

Image result for MINION JOKES


1


A woman caught her husband on the weight scale, sucking in his stomach. “That won’t help you, Joe, you know?”


“Oh it helps a lot,” says the man, “it’s the only way I can see the numbers!





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2


Police officer to a driver: “OK, driver’s license, vehicle license, first aid kit and warning triangle.”


Driver: “Nah, I’ve already got all that. But how much for that funny Captain’s cap?“




3

I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent. 

So I said, “Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?” 

One of them snarled at me, “It’s Wales, dumbo!” 

So I corrected myself, “Oh, right, so are you two whales from Ireland?” 

That’s about as far as I remember.




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4


I was making Russian tea. Unfortunately I cannot fish the teabag out of the vodka bottle.



5

Job interview in a psychiatry: 

So you’re interested in working with us. What is your experience with mentally disturbed people?
-
I’ve been on Facebook for 5 years now.
-
Very good, the job is yours.





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